Reflect...Reflect...Reflect....

im very FLAWED. capital F.
Any takers?

I love this song, Hafiz. Thank you.

"Cinta Terakhir" - Aiman

Mungkin kan terputus di tengah jalan
Mungkin kan terlerai tanpa ikatan
Usah ragu dengan takdir

Mungkin kita kan berbeza haluan
Berakhirnya cerita percintaan
Segalanya ketentuan Tuhan

Your love so great that it hurts too much.
And I have no time to heal before I break again.
It's only a matter of time...and fate.

am just hurt.

Bagai pelangi petang,

Menerangi kegelapan,

Namun,

Hadirnya hanya sebentar.

Ent laisa lee.

I hate it.

I hate it when you are angry at me.
I hate it when you went into silence.
I hate it when you say 'I dunno'.
I hate it when you say 'I want to sleep'.
I hate it when you use sarcasm.
I hate it when you're cold.
I hate it when you're mean.
I hate it when you're harsh.

I hate it that I don't hate you.

I miss that feeling.

The feeling that brought me closer to Him.

Many things I wish I could undo.

It'll take more than a lifetime to amend.

I pray for a figure who would guide me through this temporary life.....for the hereafter.

Im running out of time...


"I swear by the time,

Most surely man is in loss,

Except those who believe and do good, and enjoin on each other truth, and enjoin on each other patience."

(Surah Al-Asr)

weary and drained.

يَا أَيَّتُهَا النَّفْسُ الْمُطْمَئِنَّةُ

ارْجِعِي إِلَىٰ رَبِّكِ رَاضِيَةً مَّرْضِيَّةً

فَادْخُلِي فِي عِبَادِي

وَادْخُلِي جَنَّتِي

Jordin Sparks explains best...

One word turns into a war
Why is it the smallest things that tear us down?
My world's nothing when you don't
I'm not here without a shield
Can't go back now

never meant to start a war
You know I never wanna hurt you
Don't even know what we're fighting for

Why does love always feel like a battlefield
A battlefield, a battlefield?

Can't swallow our pride
Neither of us wanna raise that flag
If we can't surrender then we both gonna lose
What we had...

What if...
My existence is temporary...
What if...
Im around coz He wants you back on track...
And when everything seems to fall beautifully in place...
If...
If He has already decided...
There is no other reason to stay...

complicated sgt lah hidup ni.

Words can be painful sometimes.
Especially from a person u treasure.
Or perhaps the heart easily bleeds.

sejak lama aku berdiri
dalam sepinya rongga hati
tak satu pun burung mampu menjawab
hanya padaMu ku bertanya
lewat setiap sujudku ini
siapakah nanti
cinta untukku

wahai penilai hati lihat batinku
nyaris bernanah kerna luka tersayat
merana menantikan cinta dan kasih hidupku
rahasia itu hanya Kau yang tahu
namun aku tak mau jadi tuna cinta
tuntun hatiku dalam sabar menanti jodohku

rahasia itu hanya Kau yang tahu
namun aku tak mau jadi tuna cinta
namun harus ku ikhlaskan nasib cintaku padaMu

I feel like giving it up. everything.

"I tak nak jumpe you. Tkde mood."

You could at least be sensitive about it.

Never I imagined that getting close to the D-a-y feel this way.
Thought it'd be all rosy...
I've astrayed too far.
Hope He still want to hear me...even from afar.
Oh Allah.

Except those who repent and amend and make manifest (the truth), these it is to whom I turn (mercifully); and I am the Oft-returning (to mercy), the Merciful. (al-baqarah: 160)

Except those who repent after that and amend, then surely Allah is Forgiving, Merciful. (al-imran: 86)

And as for the two who are guilty of indecency from among you, give them both a punishment; then if they repent and amend, turn aside from them; surely Allah is Oft-returning (to mercy), the Merciful. (An-Nisa’: 16)

Except those who repent before you have them in your power; so know that Allah is Forgiving, Merciful. (al-maidah: 34)

And (as to) those who do evil deeds, then repent after that and believe, your Lord after that is most surely Forgiving, Merciful. (al-a’raf: 153)

time...
i need time...
im leaving everything to Him.

maybe...
maybe if you try to listen, u'd understand.
maybe if you try to look into the reason why it happened, u'd understand.
maybe if you know...
just maybe.

Dan demikianlah semuanya harus terjadi
Kerna memang harus terjadi
Hidup ini terus berlanjut
Kita semua pun pernah merasakan dikhianati dan mengkhianati
Setia dan tidak setia
Kita semua pernah merasakan cinta
Yang membawa kita ke tempat tertinggi
Kita lalu merasakan yang namanya terjatuh
Kerna kesalahan kita sendiri
Kita tidak mati
Tetapi lukanya membuat kita tidak dapat berjalan seperti dulu lagi.

"Fighting is enjoined on you, and it is an object of dislike to you; and it may be that you dislike a thing while it is good for you, and it may be that you love a thing while it is evil for you, and Allah knows, while you do not know." -alBaqarah: 216

Never feel so scared and sad as much as how i'm feeling now.
oh Allah.